Never Mistake Personality For Character Again

By: Aimee Colbert

Wisdom for becoming a master discerner of people

A. Why we should master discerning people

1. Every thing we do has to be done through a transaction or interaction with another person.
2. Relationship is crucial to your every day lives.
3. Successful relationships are crucial to your success.
4. Discerning a wrong person early on is the only thing that will save you from a long and damaging relationship.
5. Murderers, thieves and backstabbers all look like everyone else.
6. To be able to identify your enemies before they attack.
7. You will spend your whole life searching for someone that you can trust.

B. Wisdom on personality

1. Personality is decided by God to compliment your assignment on the earth.
2. Your personality is who you are in front of an audience.
3.Your personality varies according to the environment you're in.
4. People will generally use their personality or alter their personality to fullfill their ambitions.
5. You will have to weed through personality in order to learn to trust someone.

C. Wisdom on character

1. Your character is decided by whos voice you've chosen to embrace.(example: Parents raising children)
2. Your character can be like a glorious crown or a baseball cap.
3. Character is who you are when no one is watching.
4.Character is built when you conciously decide to make the right choices consistantly.
5. Character does not come with time, niether does wisdom.
6. Character is discerned in speech. People say what is in their hearts.
7. Character is displayed in reactions.

D. 4 differences between personality and character

1. In relationships, personality is what you see first, character is what you see last.
2. Personality can be faked, character can not.
3. Character is who you are on the inside, personality is who you are on the outside.
4. A contentious personality is easy to hide but good character is hard to cover up.
5. Good cahracter you can trust, fickle personalities are shallow.

E. Wisdom on why people often mistake personality for character

1. Loving someone does not make them a good, honest or trust worthy person.(example:Many people in prison have people in their lives who love them,whether they change or not.)
2. People often want to believe that the person they have grown to love is who they say they are.
3. People add false qualities to the ones they admire.
4. People spend a great deal of time and energy on promoting an image. Which leaves alot undetected.
5. Many times people can miss moments where true character is shown.
6. Often in social environments we find it inappropriate to ask about personal beliefs or perceptions which reveal character in others.
7. Not many people consider religion or personal beliefs as a deciding factor on character.
8. Alot of people live their lives contrary to their pronounced religion or personal beliefs.
9. People lie about what they are,what they've done and what they feel.
10. Love often blinds an individual to bad character.
11. People often use a fun or pleasant attitude to mask their own bad character.
12. Politeness is often mistaken for a good character.
13. Some people equate good education as a deciding factor of character in others.
14. Others believe money is an indicator of good character or wisdom.
15. People who are charitable are often seen as "good people" but giving is only one quality and doesn't mean they have other good ones.
16. Charm is very deceptive when trying to discern character.
17. People often trust reputation with out solid evidence.
18.Many people just haven't been taught on how to discern the differnce between the two. Which depending on a lack of good judgement can result in a life full of broken relationships.

F. Using the Bible to discern character in people

1.The Holy Spirit is the best discerner of people.
2.The Holy Spirit will reveal to you the true intentions of others in your life if you ask him to.
3. The fruit of the Spirit is a tool to identify the dishonest people in our lives.
4. A healthy reverence for God is a sign of good character in people.
5. Alot of people say that they love the Lord but the uncommon obey him. The people who love and obey him will have great qualities.

G. 9 How to discern character in minutes

1. Apon meeting a new individual, be sociable and not withdrawn.(This way you can promote openess in the atmosphere.)
2. Give the other person a lot of room to talk freely about themselves.(The more they talk, the easier it will become to discern what type of personality you are dealing with.)
3. Ask leading questions about themselves.
4. Begin to reveal more of your personal stance on certain beliefs or issues and ask their opinion.(Listen to their responses intently.)
5. Listen for anger, negativity, excitement or foul language.(These are key indicators to character.)
6. Don't get wrapped up in similar interest. Doing this will side tract you from the purpose of the conversation which is to disern their true self.
7. Respond to their responses, and this will take the conversation from trivial to personal.
8. Always end the conversation on a good note. You will be displaying yourself as well.
9. Do not look over what you have learned about the person. Weigh your beliefs against theirs.

H. 3 Benefits of discerning the people in your life

3.You will be able to understand the real role people in your circle play in your life.(Your life is a garden.)
2. You will be able to discern wrong people from the right ones.
1. You will be able to recognize the trustworthy and do it quickly.(You won't be devestated by trusting the wrong person, you will be devasted from not trusting the right person.)

Article Source: http://www.articles.narrowisthepath.com

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